There are three things I look for in every teacher student sex scandal story:
1. Is the teacher hot?
This should be obvious. If the teacher looks like an extra out of The Hills Have Eyes, then it’s doubtful anyone wants to hear about how she diddled a kid.
2. How old is she?
Is she in her 20’s? Cool. 50 and over? Yikes – geriatric love stories have never been hip.
3. Bonus points?
Did this teacher do anything particularly zany, like get pregnant or try to run away with the kid? Does she resemble a burnt hot dog in any way, or maybe she’s got a particularly stupid name?
I’m happy to report that the teacher in this week’s teacher student sex scandal is not only decently attractive, but she’s also 26 and named Kayla Sprinkles. Sure it could be worse – her first name could be Titty. With a name like that she was either destined for a career at Baskin Robbins or guaranteed to wind up on a stripper pole, so let’s take a moment to appreciate how life works in mysterious ways and is always full of surprises.
North Carolina’s Cherokee County Sheriff’s Office reportedly began their investigation into Sprinkles around March 26th after they were tipped off that she had “engaged in sex acts with a student” while employed at Andrews High School. Come June, however, she discovered that she was indicted on five charges and chose to flee.
“Apparently Sprinkles gained knowledge, possibly through a social media posting, of the existence of the indictments and left from the local area,” a post from the Cherokee County Sheriff’s Office reads. It wasn’t until later that she “surrendered herself to the Mecklenburg County Detention Center where she was served with the indictments and was released on a $25,000.00 unsecure bond.”
Sprinkles is scheduled to appear in Cherokee County Superior Court on July 2nd, and the sheriff’s office states that no more information will be released on “this incident” due to the age of the victim and the nature of the crime. “Our youth and our students are one of the greatest resources that Cherokee County is blessed to have,” Sheriff Derrick Palmer stated. “It is incumbent upon all of us to ensure their safety and well-being as they grow and mature.” [H/T News Channel 9]