{"won":false,"dspId":null} Man With World’s Biggest Penis Says It’s Helped Him Have Sex With Celebrities - Break.com

Man With World’s Biggest Penis Says It’s Helped Him Have Sex With Celebrities

Articles Jun 13, 2018 10:00

Women will tell you penis size doesn’t matter, because it doesn’t – it just won’t hurt your chances at all. Most girls aren’t into giant dicks that tear them in half, just the same as no one wants a what amounts to a USB drive getting ejected re-inserted over and over into their vagina. At the end of the day, it’s really all about clicking as two people and being able to communicate effectively -- unless you have the world's biggest penis, in which case apparently people line up just to fuck you.

Man With World’s Biggest Penis Says It’s Helped Him Have Sex With Celebrities

That's the case with Jonah Falcon. You see, 47-year-old Jonah is the record holder for having the world's biggest penis, measuring in at 13.5 inches when hard and nine when soft. “When I’m fully erect, I’m 13 and a half inches with a seven and a half to eight inch diameter,” he explains. “It’s thicker than my wrist.” And while most people could probably ride the big-dick wave all the way to the top of the porn ladder, Jonah wants to be taken seriously as a real “actor.” Sadly, his giant dick has reportedly earned him a reputation among film directors, preventing him from landing any major Hollywood roles.

“It’s handicapped my acting because people won’t hire me,” he tells the Sun Online. “It sucks – it relegates me into doing smaller parts. Maybe in the UK or Germany it might help my acting career, but here in Hollywood it’s a negative.”

Has anyone ever told Jonah that planes exist? Nothing is stopping you from going to the UK or Germany to become a movie star. Shit, there’s companies in Japan that’ll hire you to just sit in the corner and be white. Imagine if you walk into a business meeting and there’s just this naked dude with a giant cock hanging out in the corner; Power. Fucking. MOVE.

Though his film career is lacking, there is one other area where Jonah apparently excels: boning random celebrities. “Yes, I’ve slept with celebrities including Oscar nominees and Oscar winners, but I can’t talk about that,” he teases, only going on to say that “it wasn’t Meryl Streep.”

Man With World’s Biggest Penis Says It’s Helped Him Have Sex With Celebrities

Yeah no shit – Meryl Streep hasn’t had one of her farts sniffed since before the Revolutionary War started.

And while having a giant celebrity-fucking dick sounds like the ride of your life, there is one other downside: Jonah has to modify his sex positions to avoid penile fracture.

I'd say it myself, but I'll let Paul Gleason take it away...

Man With World’s Biggest Penis Says It’s Helped Him Have Sex With Celebrities[H/T Mirror]

 

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