7 ways to help you win your fear of rejection effectively

Articles Sep 08, 2020 09:21

Rejection in any case makes the person experiencing it sad and heartbreaking. They can even cause phobias and lead to fear of rejection in many people.

In fact, it can be difficult to find a way to overcome this fear, but positive thinking can be one of the ways to ease the rejection.

Most of us want to connect with and become close to someone we care about. So, feeling rejected by the people you love is something no one wants. That really is an uncomfortable feeling.

The pain of rejection can cause a pretty deep "cut" that hurts you for a long time. The truth is that when it's turned down, the areas of the brain that get excited are the same as when you experience physical pain. So if you've tasted them once or more, your brain will remember the pain they cause and may unconsciously develop a vague fear of rejection.

Fear of rejection can make you shy and prevent you from taking risks in order to achieve great life goals. However, you can completely overcome them by changing your mindset and attitude. Try reading through the tips below!

7 tips to get rid of your fear of being rejected

1. Remember that you are not the only one rejected

7 ways to help you win your fear of rejection effectively

It is very common to be rejected by someone and the fear of rejection is common in many people. Surely most of us have experienced rejection a few times in our lives, whether it be a small thing or a really big thing. For example:

  • A best friend ignores your outing messages
  • Rejected from a guy or girl you're interested in
  • Did not receive an invitation to the class meeting party
  • A long-term partner refuses to cooperate.

Of course, no one likes things going against your wishes, but you should also understand that not everything will follow the trajectory you have outlined for them.

However, don't let those experiences change the way you hope. Always remind yourself that rejection is a very common thing in life. Everyone will have to deal with this at some point in their life. So, don't let fear of rejection in the past influence your current decisions.

2. Frankly admit the true feelings

7 ways to help you win your fear of rejection effectively

Whatever the reason for the rejection, it will definitely hurt you, especially if you are sensitive. When the bystanders look in, they may feel you are taking the problem seriously and often advise you to get through with statements like "everything will be fine".

However, in reality, only you can measure the degree of grief as well as the effect of rejection on your own mood. Feelings of rejection are also related to many other emotions, such as confusion, embarrassment, and embarrassment.

Remember, no one can accurately describe the feelings you will experience when rejection, except yourself. Therefore, frankly acknowledge your feelings, share them with loved ones if possible, and find ways to cope and control them.

3. See the "rejected" experience as an opportunity to learn

While you may not realize it right away, rejection can be an opportunity to help you discover and develop yourself. For example, you apply for a job at a desired company and have a pretty decent interview.

However, after that, you are not employed. This can be a big shock and discourage you for a while. However, this is not the time for you to break down and give up. What you need to do is to review things, review your resume, improve some other necessary knowledge and skills.

After a while, you will find that thanks to being rejected, you can prepare more knowledge and skills to apply for a much better-earning position than before. . See your fear of rejection as a driving force to help you develop yourself and try what you want. Why don't you try to tell yourself, "This may not work, but even if it doesn't work out, I have had a meaningful experience and know more."

On the emotional side, being rejected in love can be an opportunity for you to rethink what you want to look for in your partner. Then use these experiences to choose someone who is right for you from the start.

4. Don't forget your own values

7 ways to help you win your fear of rejection effectively

Rejection can be very intimidating when you take it too seriously. For example, you have been dating for a while and suddenly the other person no longer shows any interest or care. Then, you worry that you may have done something that made them feel bored and do not want to continue the relationship. However, sometimes the problem is not with you, but with both of them or sometimes just the other person.

Building your self-esteem and self-worth helps you to believe that you are absolutely worthy of love. This helps to alleviate the fear of rejection and continue your quest for love. To bolster your confidence, try:

  • Write a paragraph about 3 situations that make you feel most proud of yourself
  • List 5 ways you always strive to enhance your personal worth
  • Think about the good things you'll do for your partner.

This seemingly simple can help you redefine your own worth and thereby gain more confidence in yourself.

5. Maintain a personal opinion

7 ways to help you win your fear of rejection effectively

If you are a sensitive person and are worried about everything, you often think things in a negative way. Suppose, you do not pass the university exam as you like and start to worry because you may fail all the programs that you apply for. This makes you have to practice to try again next year.

Next, you think that maybe next year you will fail again. In the future, where your career future will be, which company will accept you without a degree, then your economy will be unstable. You cannot buy a house, build a home ...

This cycle of negative thinking is called catastrophizing and of course it's not true at all. Instead of thinking about bad situations and feeling scared, why not hold a strong point of view and belief in yourself, and then develop some backup plans to help overcome your fear of self.

6. Find out what you are really afraid of when rejected

Discovering the truths behind your fear of rejection will help you to deal with it. The fear of rejection may be because you don't like feeling lonely and need someone to love.

If so, instead of finding a partner, why not try to build or strengthen stronger relationships like friends or family? That can help you stop feeling lonely and afraid of rejection. Sometimes, being rejected is no longer scary if you know you still have better relationships.

7 ways to help you win your fear of rejection effectively

If the fear of being rejected by an employer comes from not knowing how to have a stable income stream or not having a backup plan for the future, then why not outline a few other suitable paths. your abilities and implement them when you have not found the job you like?

7. Stop thinking about the negative things

You tend to be self-critical and questioning yourself after being rejected, like: "I ruined everything", "I did too much wrong" or "I'm really boring."

However, this will only make you believe that the rejection is your fault, when the truth may not be. If you believe that rejection is not good enough in yourself, that fear can go on and become a self-fulfilling prophecy. This is a term coined by the sociologist Robert K. Merton. Accordingly, false prophecies can come true if people truly believe it.

Thinking positively doesn't always make the situation better, but it does change your perspective. When you motivate and motivate yourself, you will trust your abilities and work harder to achieve your goals.

Watch next: 8 Proven Ways to Boost Your Self Confidence

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